For Sincerity's Sake and Cigars to Boot
by hajimenokizu
Summary: In order to save his father's posterity and his own devices, Kondou Isami calls on Toshi's assistance. Alternate Universe


Cuban cigars, they were his one biggest failing at least in public. One could call Kondou Isami a connoisseur in that respect but this story isn't about him and his lofty vice. Well at least not directly.

You see… Kondou was a good man, save for his occasional "indiscretions" on the side. He was a good provider to his wife and child and if one would talk to his "men", not one of them would breathe a bad word about "the boss". Well maybe with the exception Nagakura Shinpachi, not a bad man really, just a rather outspoken lad who let his mouth run ahead of his brains more often than not.

It was this same young lad who went up to Kondou's office earlier that morning in a huff complaining that "the boss'" policy of providing "exceptional customer service in the spirit of Makoto" was not at all working. That Kondou had forgotten why they were there in the first place. The argument was a common scene in their "lot" so no one stepped in to stop the bickering between the two except of course Hijikata Toshizou. The tall brooding man that Kondou affectionately referred to as "Toshi", who'd actually become quite the handyman for the group gaining the alias "Peacemaker". Quite a misnomer in fact as it was usually "Toshi" who would initiate competition amongst the men inside and drive "SMC" competitors into a frenzy, but no one in the group ever noticed his rather grand ministrations obviously… Ironic? When did people ever smell their own body odor? I digress.

So there was "the boss" puffing on his cigar with his feet up the desk, looking through the glass as his men went about their daily work. He hired each one of them personally almost four years ago. That was the way his stepfather conducted business, "personally" and indeed it's kept the "SMC" alive for three generations. So he puzzled on what he was doing wrong. He paid the men generously enough, their health insurance was number one (dental too!) and he certainly made sure morale was high by treating his men out to "private" clubs every Friday. So why indeed that when he finally examined their earnings report did they come out in the red? And not only that, they've been in the red for the last three years! "The boss" wondered vaguely if he should've looked at the earnings report on a yearly basis…

It was time to bite the bullet so he called his right hand man, Toshi into his office. If anyone can solve the problem, the "Peacemaker" can, Kondou grinned.

"So Toshi…"

"Yes Kondou-san?"

"Did you know about this?" Kondou handed him the accounting papers and went back to his seat. Seeing Toshi's frown deepen, Kondou wondered if a little plastic surgery could help his friend. Turn the upside down smile, into… Well what else but a true blue bishounen smile?

"If this goes on we'll be forced to close by winter…" Toshi replied and tossed the papers back.

"Any suggestions?" Kondou lifted his head and put out the cigar as Toshi went over by the door and quietly –locked- it.

"Seppuku…"

"You've got to be kidding…"

"I'm not Kondou-san. It is unfortunate."

"I see…" Kondou stood up beside Toshi and once again looked out to his men. Seppuku, the words he never wanted to hear… But they were far better than the real thing and more –secure-.

"I'd suggest Inoue. He's an old man and doesn't bring much business in with his age."

"That would be age discrimination Toshi."

"No one has to know…"

"Find someone else. He's been here the longest, working under my father."

"Fine… How about Saitou? He's always going off on his own and seems disinterested."

Kondou shook his head, "That man is a hard worker, he usually closes up shop and besides I took him in so he'd not get into anymore trouble."

"This is not a charity Kondou-san! It's a business!"

"I see dormant potential in him. We will regret it if he goes to a competitor."

"Fine… Then how about Harada? He seems to have a screw lose. Who in his right mind would threaten to kill himself just because some stranger belittled our company?"

"You can't fault a man for having loyalty. That's hard to find these days." Kondou chuckled, "And Shinpachi and Harada are good friends, we only need one casualty."

"So I guess that throws out Shinpachi…"

"Of course Toshi." Kondou nodded.

"Todou Heisuke?"

"Too young and we owe his father some money."

"We do?"

"Yes… Todou's father is a wealthy and influential man but his son didn't want to live on inheritance."

"Hmmm… Todou can come in handy in these types of situation." Hijikata sighed. "How about Sannan?"

"Not him. You two have a public quarrel. It can't be helped if it is misunderstood as favoritism."

Kondou scanned his men one more time until his gaze finally remained at the last remaining man he had.

"Don't tell me Souji… He's like a son to you…" Toshi shook his head but Kondou kept staring at the young man who was surrounded by children and pretty young girls (and their parents) as usual.

"Maybe… He'll do."

"I can't let you make this mistake Kondou-san!" Toshi's eyes went ablaze as he steeped into Kondou's vision. "Out of everyone you have here, he's the only one who can produce! He's your best salesman!"

"He does seem popular with the ladies." Kondou chuckled, "and children too…"

"-Exactly-… He's sold more cars this week than the whole group combined."

"What do you think is his secret?"

"Well isn't it obvious Kondou-san? That angelic face of his helps and he seems to have a natural charm about him…"

"Ah yes… Indeed." Kondou's eyes lit up, a flicker of life danced in them and Toshi blinked as he recognized that slightly demonic look on Kondou's face.

"How many cars have you sold this week Toshi?"

The "Peacemaker" took a step back and cast his eyes to the side. In a low voice he answered, "None Kondou-san…"

"Sou ka… I guess I have no choice." Kondou inhaled deeply, "Seppuku…"

Toshi knew it was coming, the dreaded words they deviced together as a code name for "Lay-off". Not that he thought he was secure in this job. No job was secure. No man was "indispensable". He was not the type to burn bridges so he humbly bowed and mumbled, "I'll pack up my things then. It was an honor working with you."

"Toshi…"

"Yes Kondou-san?"

"I always thought you were a diamond in the ruff, there is a way to fix this if you are willing… We are good friends after all."

"I hate pity Kondou.. You know that. Now if you'll excuse me." Toshi turned to leave.

"When you go out that door, head to Okita."

"What in Kami's name are you talking about?"

"Beguile them with your "masculine charms". That shouldn't be too hard, just smile at the girls and build your own fanbase. Selling cars should go easier then."

And that was how the Shieikan Motor Center, otherwise known as "SMC", managed to survive another year, their spirit of "exceptional customer service in the spirit of Makoto" intact.

And yes... Kondou Isami was able to afford Cuban cigars for another year.

THE END.

---

This was partly inspired by PMK, some characterizations and stories come from other Shinsengumi portrayals and stories. I do not own PMK but love it anyway!


End file.
